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    If you have popped over here from my facebook page could you please add comments in the blog rather than on the link on facebook itself. I dont want to worry YD unnecessarily Thanks. You can now use your facebook log in so you dont need to enter extra details if you like
  • All about Gertrude

    Gertrude is the name we decided to call my cancerous breast hence the title of this blog. Although I had to keep my breast through chemo and radiation due to the nature of IBC - once it 'blew up' it no longer looked like my breast and I couldn't wait to get rid of it. Calling it Gertrude was a way of seperating it from myself. This main page is where I write about the general goings on that relate to Gertrude, there is another page that are more a diary of treatments etc This blog is a public blog so although I am being very honest about my battle with Gertrude I have "changed names to protect the innocent" - because everyone can see it if you write comments on the blog pages please use the same abbreviations for other family member or friends that I do. Please feel free to ask questions if you want clarification because then other people who might have been wondering the same thing can read your question and our answers.
  • Abbreviations

    OH- Other Half (Hubby), OD- Oldest Daughter, MD- Middle Daugher, YD- Youngest Daughter, SB- soulja boi MD's fiance in the army (now ex fiance), OD's R OD's partner, BS- Breast surgeon whose initials just happen to be BS as well, BC- our GP (family doctor), Dr H- my medical oncologist, all other friends family etc will be referred to as initials etc
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  • SUSAN’S ARMY

    No Princess Alone button

Decisions

I had my second 1 0n 1 counselling session with the Cancer Society Counselling service – she was surprised at my mood – I was a lot more bubbly than when she last saw me.  This is in part due to the fact I have made some decisions about how I want to move forward.  Part of my problem lately is how to move forward with life in general with realistic expectations of what my life could be like from now on.  I do have a very real fear of recurrence which is justifiable with IBC but it is how to move forward , hoping that recurrence doesn’t occur but not to put everything off or be totally consumed by the fear or totally ingnore it.  The reality is I do have to live with the threat of recurrence but not let it rule my life.  I have been working a lot in the past few weeks and the repetitious nature of the lotto terminals is definitely not good for my niggles.  I have almost complete pain-free range of movement back in my right arm/shoulder (Only a couple of centimeters/less than an inch differrence in reach between left and right arms – I have my pink pilates program to thank for that) but I have pain/swelling and tenderness in my chest and in my collarbone.  Which gets worse with arm shoulder activity – especially work.  This has made me think what I want to do next year.  I have decided to go back to university and study for a Bachelor of Social Work or similar.  I have worked in this area in the past voluntarily with my special needs support group work, and have thought about doing it in the past but when YD was still at home I knew the stressful workload of studying and working in that field as well as dealing with YD was not the best option for me.  Now that YD has left home , I think the time is right for me to pursue it, and I think with my experiences of the health and disability sector first with YD and now with my own personal health experience puts me in a good position to help others.  If  I have to deal with ongoing health issues ( recurrence or other issues arising from Gertrude) I can look at doing less papers one semester or taking a semester off.  but it means at the end of 4-5 years I will have got through the danger period for recurrence and also have a qualification in the field I wish to pursue.  This has made me feel much more at peace with what the future might bring.  I would like to believe I am going to live for the next 30 years and this will set me up for a productive use of those years – at the same time, allowing me flexibility to deal with what ever may come.  I believe this is the best decision I could make at this time.

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2 Comments

  1. Jenny

     /  September 1, 2009

    Great decision. Its good to do study at our age, keeps those brain cells working. I’m loving doing my teaching degree, even though it is hard at times.

    Reply
  2. Sis M

     /  October 19, 2009

    You go girl – be yourself and do what makes you happy

    Reply

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