“Mixed Nuts” is the facebook group we created for our year of the BSW degree
To my dear ‘Mixed Nuts’ family
You are all so diverse and I think mixed nuts was a great name for our group representing the unique ‘flavours’ we have all bought to the group
I just want you to know how much yesterday meant to me and I was so glad so many of you turned and said such lovely things about me… I felt so much love in that room.
my lovely gifts and cards
One thing I had wished I had said last night that I didn’t think about until I was talking to V at the end was that you all indicated that you were all so amazed ‘that I had kept coming to Uni with everything else that was going on in my life’.
What you don’t realize is that it was for my own sanity. I had my oldest daughter when I was 22 and had my youngest when I was 26. When my youngest (YD) was born with a chromosome deletion my identity became first and foremost ‘YD’s Mum’. When your child with a disability gets a label so do you… especially if you try to be assertive and get the services for your child that they need. YD left home 8 months before I was first diagnosed with Inflammatory Breast Cancer, one of the rarest but the most aggressive forms of Breast Cancer so I went from YD’s ‘Mum’ to the new ‘Label’ of ‘ A Cancer Patient’ in very quick succession. University has been the first time in many years where I have been Jenny, a university student and recognised as myself rather than ‘the Mum’ or ‘ the patient’ and that has saved my sanity in this journey I have been taking. Thank you all for seeing me as Jenny first and foremost, even though those other labels were still there they were not the most prominent one.
Thank you again for showing the love and being my family the past 2-3 years. Go well and I am sure you are all going to be absolutely amazing Social Workers
Love to you all
Jenny
Karen
/ July 26, 2012I heard about your blog from a friend of a friend who also has IBC. Your previous post was inspiring – it’s amazing how you can explain things to your youngest daughter, and how she processes things through drawings.
You’d make a fine social worker, and I’m sorry if that won’t be, at least not now.
I also found grad school helpful during a difficult time.
I am uncomfortable with how people come out in droves when there’s possibly sad news online – so I hope my comment isn’t unwelcome.
Take care – and best wishes to you and your family.