Apart from the ‘travelling pants’ what have I been up to these past 3 weeks since I wrote about the decision of stopping chemo.
I had my exam for the one paper I was doing this semester on the 18th June so some of the time was spent studying for that. Although to be totally honest I struggled to find the motivation. I had a bad cold the week before the exam and I struggled to study because of that but also it was a slight case of the ‘why bothers’ – I couldnt help thinking to myself what was the point of studying for an exam when I was not intending to carry on with the course and there was very little hope of me graduating. OH even asked me why I was bothering with sitting the exam…. but it came down to the fact I had committed myself to this semester … regardless of whether I was carrying on or not I had to prove to myself that I could finish what I had started and pass this paper at least.
Once the exam was over I started to unwind. At my last oncology appointment Dr H had added yet another painkiller to the mix – something that would work on the pain in my fingers and toes. Amtriptylene is also a antidepressant, not that I need it for that, but also acts as somewhat of a sleeping pill. So I have been sleeeping a lot somedays – a solid 10-12 hours sleep at night and then sometimes still an afternoon nap of2-3 hours. But I am just listening to my body and sleeping if it says to sleep. I’m making up for all the time the pain (corrrect medical term paraethesia) kept me awake at night.
I have not been totally lazy however. I volunteered to go down to Rotorua last weekend to man a display for Breast Cancer Aotearoa Coalition at an event that was part of the inaugaral mid-winter festival. (The organiser of an “Undies Splash and Dash” were to split the proceeds between our group and the Prostate Foundation. There wasnt a huge number of entries for this the first event but they have high hopes for next year). As I don’t trust myself to drive that far, I organised for Gary to come with me and for us to stay the night down there. I tthought it would give us a chance to have a little bit of a weekend away.
We meandered around Government Gardens on the Sunday morning, had a soak in the private hot pools at Polynesian Spa and drove out to see the Blue and Green Lakes and Lake Tarawera.
SisM has also helped get me out and about. She has an overabundance of annual leave to use up so is taking Fridays off at the moment so for the last two Fridays we have gone for short walks, first week was a walk around the Botanical Gardens after her taking me to get my port flushed at the local district nurses office, and a pleasant brunch at the Gardens cafe. Then this week it was a walk around the coastline at Maraetai C came with us as she has also finished her exams. It was a gorgeous day for the middle of winter
And of course there was the obligatory cafe stop when we got back to Maraetai.
This next week my wonderful Uni friend AW has organised for us to go away to a bach at Whangamata. It will be myself, AW, MH and NU-B (my best uni friends) for Thursday and Friday nights and then OH and possibly some of the rest of the family may come down for the Saturday and Sunday nights. I am really looking forward to it – I am hoping the weather is good for it. but we are quite happy to curl up with books etc if it isn’t
My hair, my taste, appetite, and energy are returning slowly, my fingers are responding to the amitriptylene and are calming down a little so I am definitely feeling a little more like my normal self, I have been off chemo for a month now and I am hoping in another months time things will have recovered even more.